One of the really nice things about U of M Med Center is the update they give me every few days of my condition. It’s so helpful to see how my caregivers are viewing me, and I see hints in there as to what they’re hoping to accomplish in the near and far future.
Author: Annie Modesitt
Three Lovely Guests
It feels as though I’ve been in UM Hospital for a week, but it’s only been 4 days. They’re exceptional here, and I may be most impressed with my physical therapist. He knows how to get me to do good, steady work, and is steady with his praise. Today he said I’d shown so much…
This All Seems So Familiar…
This blood cancer thing is like the NY Mob; Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in!
Do I LOOK Like Jack Nicholson?
I just had one of the most annoying—yet entertaining—encounters I’ve ever had with room service. At the where we’re staying, they offer a “Big Kahuna” burger on the menu with SPAM and lots of other stuff. It’s $16, and aside from the beef and spam, I don’t really want anything else that’s on the burger….
Packed and Ready!
Last January I was at a very low point. I was finishing up my chemo, which was great, but I’d lost my dear Gerry, and even though my treatments for Lymphoma were almost finished, I felt terrible. Walking to the door was a problem, and I was relegated to a wheelchair for most of my…
A Year Out
Every three months I’ve been going in for my checkup with my oncologist, every 6 months I get a pet scan to make sure the Lymphoma’s not returning. So far, so good – until today. The numbers were a bit wacky, so I have to go back on Thursday for some more decisive tests. I’m expecting all to be well, it’s really the only way to focus my mind and not go a bit crazy waiting for test results.
Advice, From Within & From Outside
It’s hard to swallow that this is still my reality 11 months after finishing my chemo. I definitely have ups and downs in my recovery, and when I overdo or force myself past my limitations, I end up paying for it afterward.
That’s the hardest thing to accept. I can’t push myself out of this, I have to just let recovery happen in it’s own time.
Living Through Reality
I do feel alone quite often, but that’s a function of my recovery. It’s hard to get out and socialize; moving is painful, I get so tired, and being in a crowd (even in a restaurant) seems to unsettle me in a new way. I don’t know if it’s because for 18 months I’ve essentially lived most of my life in a hospital room, a bedroom or my living room, but my Living with Loss group at Gilda’s Club (6-10 people) is about as large a group of people that I feel comfortable interacting with.
Grateful Every Day
We’re buckling down because a ‘once-in-a-decade’ storm is supposed to be coming, although at this point it’s six hours late (and it will probably be angrier for waiting…) One friend is writing, his wife is making Swedish pancakes and the kids are organizing a board game for later in the day.
Pushing Myself To Exhaustion
As seldom as I seem to be blogging these days, you may not hear from me again until after Thanksgiving, so I hope you all have an exceptional holiday with loving friends and/or family and snugly animals to pet and love! And thank you all for sticking with me during this really rough year. It’s been hard, and I’ve had a good amount of loss, but I have SO MUCH to be thankful for – and I am!